Today's shots were ok.
HCG shot still hurt a little, but since it was delayed, it didn't hurt as much as it could I guess.
I know DH gets some sick pleasure out of watching me suffer from it lol.
AF is still here and not looking like she's ever going to leave. It's not heavy or anything, just at that stage where it's kind of light, starting to turn brown... etc. Just that point where you want it over with already so you can jump your man.
The benefiber stuff is still helping. My body is still trying to do the diarrhea thing sometimes, but since starting the stuff, I'm not going as often as I have been.
It is causing me to get some bad cramping in my intestines. I guess maybe they're just not used to working properly right now lol. Hopefully the longer I keep taking it the better all of that gets.
Uhm, I think that's it.
No, no measurements this week. I'll do that next week though once I start exercising again.
Friday, July 30, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Day 2 of stims
Day 2, not too bad.
The low dose HCG shot was a little more painful, but not terrible. Man I hate that stuff though. Hurts like hell when it does kick in most of the time.
The follistim shot hurt a little too for some reason.
Also got a really strong cramp on my left ovary and a few twinges on my right. I really hope this means I'm responding to the lower dose. I'm not getting my hopes up too much. Don't want to be disappointed on Saturday if nothing shows up on the u/s.
Oh and my weight was 220 this morning. Took it kind of late, so not fully trusting it. I'll weigh again tomorrow morning when I wake up.
Still no exercise, but AF should be gone in a few more days.
The low dose HCG shot was a little more painful, but not terrible. Man I hate that stuff though. Hurts like hell when it does kick in most of the time.
The follistim shot hurt a little too for some reason.
Also got a really strong cramp on my left ovary and a few twinges on my right. I really hope this means I'm responding to the lower dose. I'm not getting my hopes up too much. Don't want to be disappointed on Saturday if nothing shows up on the u/s.
Oh and my weight was 220 this morning. Took it kind of late, so not fully trusting it. I'll weigh again tomorrow morning when I wake up.
Still no exercise, but AF should be gone in a few more days.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Baseline Ultrasound
So, I had my baseline ultrasound this morning.
No Big Cysts!!! WOOOOO
Don't know if it was the red clover, maybe even the vitex I was taking that may have helped, but damnit am I glad that those big black blobs weren't staring back at me on the monitor!
So I'm starting follistim and low dose hcg today.
Not happy about the hcg but I'm excited to get started with the follistim again.
BUT, they have me starting on 75u again. UUUUUUUUUGH. That's what they had me do the first time, when it took 15 fucking days to FINALLY trigger.
I hope it doesn't take that long this time. All of the appointments, all of the follistim and the $105 per vial we have to pay after insurance, and the damn hcg shots every day. UUUUUUUGH
Anywho, NOT complaining about starting by any means, just complaining about the possible long stimulation again lol.
No weigh in or measurements today since the appointment. I'll get those tomorrow though. My weight may be up.
I started taking Benefiber yesterday and boy do I think it's working. I didn't have a BM yesterday at all and had a very small one this morning. So it may be backing me up a bit lol. It says to take 2tsp 3 times a day, but I may just reduce it to 2 times a day to start with.
I got that orange flavored stuff. It's not bad. Reminds me of Gatorade. Leaves that kind of dry powdery feeling in your mouth. Doesn't take bad though. Like watered down koolade.
No Big Cysts!!! WOOOOO
Don't know if it was the red clover, maybe even the vitex I was taking that may have helped, but damnit am I glad that those big black blobs weren't staring back at me on the monitor!
So I'm starting follistim and low dose hcg today.
Not happy about the hcg but I'm excited to get started with the follistim again.
BUT, they have me starting on 75u again. UUUUUUUUUGH. That's what they had me do the first time, when it took 15 fucking days to FINALLY trigger.
I hope it doesn't take that long this time. All of the appointments, all of the follistim and the $105 per vial we have to pay after insurance, and the damn hcg shots every day. UUUUUUUGH
Anywho, NOT complaining about starting by any means, just complaining about the possible long stimulation again lol.
No weigh in or measurements today since the appointment. I'll get those tomorrow though. My weight may be up.
I started taking Benefiber yesterday and boy do I think it's working. I didn't have a BM yesterday at all and had a very small one this morning. So it may be backing me up a bit lol. It says to take 2tsp 3 times a day, but I may just reduce it to 2 times a day to start with.
I got that orange flavored stuff. It's not bad. Reminds me of Gatorade. Leaves that kind of dry powdery feeling in your mouth. Doesn't take bad though. Like watered down koolade.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Tomorrow, we'll see
Tomorrow is my appointment. It's at 9 in the morning so, we'll see if we'll start meds or not.
Come on ovaries, don't fail me now like you always do!
Who knew that some of us would actually come to a point in our lives, where
1- we'd be happy to see AF come.
and
2- We'd actually be excited to start poking ourselves with needles..
Damnit, it better work this cycle or I'm gonna be PISSED again :P
Come on ovaries, don't fail me now like you always do!
Who knew that some of us would actually come to a point in our lives, where
1- we'd be happy to see AF come.
and
2- We'd actually be excited to start poking ourselves with needles..
Damnit, it better work this cycle or I'm gonna be PISSED again :P
Sunday, July 25, 2010
No exercise
Sorry for not updating this weekend!!
No exercise since Friday. I dunno what it is, but I just don't want to do it at all when DH is home. It's not the, not wanting him to watch me thing b/c he usually does yard work and I could do it then, I just don't feel like it honestly, and I don't.
AF showed up today (Sunday). Really excited and nervous to get to the RE and get checked out. Hopefully will get in on tuesday, and start the fert stuff then as well. FX for no damn cysts.
No exercise since Friday. I dunno what it is, but I just don't want to do it at all when DH is home. It's not the, not wanting him to watch me thing b/c he usually does yard work and I could do it then, I just don't feel like it honestly, and I don't.
AF showed up today (Sunday). Really excited and nervous to get to the RE and get checked out. Hopefully will get in on tuesday, and start the fert stuff then as well. FX for no damn cysts.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Meh, tired but ok
Did weigh stuff today. Only did the 1-2 circuit since that's really all I was doing with the harder one since I don't do the pushups.
DH just doesn't understand why I don't even try.
I CAN'T. 1 my wrists apparently can't handle my weight being on them like that and start hurting.
Also, what the hell is the point when I barely go down. I probably go down a half an inch, IF that much.
It's not an exercise I'm suddenly going to be able to do if I just keep at it. No, it'll be just a strain on my wrists.
SO frustrating!
Anyways... today was the last provera pill! WOOOOOO I can't wait for a new cycle to start and start TTC again!!
DH just doesn't understand why I don't even try.
I CAN'T. 1 my wrists apparently can't handle my weight being on them like that and start hurting.
Also, what the hell is the point when I barely go down. I probably go down a half an inch, IF that much.
It's not an exercise I'm suddenly going to be able to do if I just keep at it. No, it'll be just a strain on my wrists.
SO frustrating!
Anyways... today was the last provera pill! WOOOOOO I can't wait for a new cycle to start and start TTC again!!
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
And done
Feeling better today after my meltdown yesterday.
Did cardio and I kicked some booty. Well, for most of it anyway. Started getting a cramp on my side so had to ease up a bit, but the rest of it was good.
I didn't do the abs again. I might start those back up next time. We'll see.
Did cardio and I kicked some booty. Well, for most of it anyway. Started getting a cramp on my side so had to ease up a bit, but the rest of it was good.
I didn't do the abs again. I might start those back up next time. We'll see.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Why?
Just wondering if I'm the only one that ever wonders this.
Now let me start by saying that I have no problem with the naked human body. I'm an artist so I've had to look at my fair share of them when looking for some good referenaces etc etc.
But why do pregnant women feel the need to get naked and take a photo of their big naked baby bump bodies?
Well, I get that they probably feel beautiful, and they are in their own way. But I dunno, it just seems weird to me for some reason lol.
Not saying that they shouldn't do it, but I just don't like looking at it. I don't have a problem with the baby bump part. It's the breasts that bother me.
Now I don't have a problem with breasts in general. Most of the time they're beautiful, and they're fun to draw, but when it's a pregnant woman's big swollen breasts w/ the HUGE nipples... it weirds me out.
There's really no reason, just one of those unexplained things that bother me.
It's like whenever I've watched videos of labor, specially water births or photos of it. I don't want to see them pushing while they're huge boobs are hanging all out.
Maybe its my repressed US mentality of breasts=sex... who knows. I'm sure I'll get over it whenever I get preggo.
Now let me start by saying that I have no problem with the naked human body. I'm an artist so I've had to look at my fair share of them when looking for some good referenaces etc etc.
But why do pregnant women feel the need to get naked and take a photo of their big naked baby bump bodies?
Well, I get that they probably feel beautiful, and they are in their own way. But I dunno, it just seems weird to me for some reason lol.
Not saying that they shouldn't do it, but I just don't like looking at it. I don't have a problem with the baby bump part. It's the breasts that bother me.
Now I don't have a problem with breasts in general. Most of the time they're beautiful, and they're fun to draw, but when it's a pregnant woman's big swollen breasts w/ the HUGE nipples... it weirds me out.
There's really no reason, just one of those unexplained things that bother me.
It's like whenever I've watched videos of labor, specially water births or photos of it. I don't want to see them pushing while they're huge boobs are hanging all out.
Maybe its my repressed US mentality of breasts=sex... who knows. I'm sure I'll get over it whenever I get preggo.
So yeah
Did my workout. Only half assed hough. I didn't do the last big of the weight training. My elbow still feels hurt. I had to take it easy on that arm once I started going. Cause it feels ok now, but once working out, it started to feel weird.
I ate some chips with my lunch. Kind of a poor me sort of thing I guess. Thankfully it ws only crumbs at the bottom of the bag though. Probably only about a serving and a half that I did eat. So not feeling bad about it.
I ate some chips with my lunch. Kind of a poor me sort of thing I guess. Thankfully it ws only crumbs at the bottom of the bag though. Probably only about a serving and a half that I did eat. So not feeling bad about it.
Grrrrr
End of week 5 results...
First number is from last week, 2nd today
Weight- 222, 221
Left Upper Arm- 15.5, 15
Right Upper Arm- 16, 16
Bust- 42.25, 42
Below Bust- 38.5, 37.5
Belly above Bellybutton- 41, 41
Waist- 39.5, 40.5
Hips + Pooch- 47, 47.5
Right Mid Thigh- 22, 22.25
Left Mid Thigh- 22, 22.5
Sigh.... damnit, wish my weight had been what it was yesterday. 220, or better yet 219.
Pisses me off.
My photos every week don't even look like they change. Hell, some of them make me look like I've gotten fatter!! Don't even get me started on this damn tanktop, and every fucking clothing line thinking that big girls WANT to wear nothing but horizontal stripes. NM that horizontal stripes does nothing but accentuate the fattness and makes you look even fatter!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I mean seriously??? Why not just put a big ass logo on a shirt that says FAT ASS and just get it over with.
GOD this is all so fucking frustrating. I am so PISSED OFF.
I've been at this for over a month now and what the hell do I have to show for it?? OOO 6lbs.
Whoopdifrickingdo when I have oh, 80+ more to go! When I have fucking PCOS hindering any fucking progress I should be making. NM these damn fertility treatments that all seem to make you even fatter!
I am so glad we didn't take off 3 months to lose weight. Why? B/c losing 30lbs would've been impossible for me in 3 months.
I'm just so tired of all of this bullshit. The infertility, this weight, everything.
I'm sorry to rant like this, sorry for all the F-bombs, but god.... I am just so SO tired. It always feels like just when things start looking good, like it's going to work, nope, no... not for me!
I mean who the hell knows if we'll even be able to start trying again next cycle. I really think I still have large cysts. I really hope I'm wrong. I guess we'll find out next week.
Sigh, I just want this all to be over with already. The TTC part that is. Well, I know we'll probably have to go through all of this again if we decide to have another, if we can ever get pregnant with our first.
I need to be a mommy already. I need DH to be a daddy.
Monday, July 19, 2010
Quickie
Just had to update before going to bed.
Upper back is pretty jacked up. Should be getting plenty of rest from WoW tomorrow though since my realm is down for maintenance for 24hrs heh.
I may use the 3lb weights for the back weight lifts tomorrow so I don't make it worse.
Uuuhm, oh, AF may come on Sunday. I thought my last pill would be on friday, but I can't count or add apparently so yeah. My last pill is on thursday.
Writing this down everywhere so I won't forget. I need to tell DH so he can tell his boss that he may need to take off a few hours on tuesday. He doesn't like giving only a day's notice so, hopefully this will be plenty of time.
Feels like there was something else I wanted to say but now I don't remember.
Oh well!
Upper back is pretty jacked up. Should be getting plenty of rest from WoW tomorrow though since my realm is down for maintenance for 24hrs heh.
I may use the 3lb weights for the back weight lifts tomorrow so I don't make it worse.
Uuuhm, oh, AF may come on Sunday. I thought my last pill would be on friday, but I can't count or add apparently so yeah. My last pill is on thursday.
Writing this down everywhere so I won't forget. I need to tell DH so he can tell his boss that he may need to take off a few hours on tuesday. He doesn't like giving only a day's notice so, hopefully this will be plenty of time.
Feels like there was something else I wanted to say but now I don't remember.
Oh well!
Good good
So I did the cardio stuff today. Woot woot!
Didn't stop once to take a break during the knee lifts at the beginning which I'm happy about. I usually have to take at least 2 breaks to give my poor legs a break, but I pushed through it. Now I did take a short break afterwards but still lol.
The next part of the workout is a jumping jack, run in place, and run lunges section. I had to stop during this. I run around the living room, foyer, etc b/c I dn't feel like my running in place does anything. And I do it for the run lunges and jumping jacks sometimes as well. Well, go over to the room w/ the treadmill, and there's dog shit on the floor. BLEEEEEEEEEEEH
So had to stop and pick that up and spray the area. Damn dogs.
But I got back to it and did it. Didn't feel as intense though b/c my heart rate went back down when I had to stop.
It's all good though.
Weighed myself before working out, 220, weighed myself after, 219!! I just hope one of those is on the scale tomorrow!
Didn't stop once to take a break during the knee lifts at the beginning which I'm happy about. I usually have to take at least 2 breaks to give my poor legs a break, but I pushed through it. Now I did take a short break afterwards but still lol.
The next part of the workout is a jumping jack, run in place, and run lunges section. I had to stop during this. I run around the living room, foyer, etc b/c I dn't feel like my running in place does anything. And I do it for the run lunges and jumping jacks sometimes as well. Well, go over to the room w/ the treadmill, and there's dog shit on the floor. BLEEEEEEEEEEEH
So had to stop and pick that up and spray the area. Damn dogs.
But I got back to it and did it. Didn't feel as intense though b/c my heart rate went back down when I had to stop.
It's all good though.
Weighed myself before working out, 220, weighed myself after, 219!! I just hope one of those is on the scale tomorrow!
Much better today
Sleep wasn't that great, but at least my body isn't aching. I still feel guilty, but glad I rested yesterday. My back may still be a bit janky but if I feel it's weird, I'll take it more easy with today's workout.
My foot doesn't hurt anymore. And my elbow, still feels kinda weird, but only barely.
So will do sweat today. I'll try to get in a really good workout to help make up for all the days that I missed.
My foot doesn't hurt anymore. And my elbow, still feels kinda weird, but only barely.
So will do sweat today. I'll try to get in a really good workout to help make up for all the days that I missed.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Nothing today
I know I said I was going to exercise this weekend, but apparently my body has other plans.
My lower back is jacked up, along with my upper back. My right foot hurts for some reason, and my right elbow hurts.
I know how the elbow got hurt, well not hurt hurt, but aching. It was when I was doing the forearm weight lifts yesterday. I dunno if I did them wrong or what, but afterwards, my elbow hurt to be straightened out.
My lower back, no clue. My upper back is probably just from playing WoW too much again. I just started back on it and my body isn' used to sitting in the computer chair for that long any longer lol.
Pretty pathetic way to injure yourself, but it happened.
No idea why my foot is bothering me though. I noticed it starting yesterday, but didn't think much of it, and now it hurts more.
So today, just going to take it easy. Go lay on the couch and rest my weak apparently frail body :P
Damn you milk! You lied!
My lower back is jacked up, along with my upper back. My right foot hurts for some reason, and my right elbow hurts.
I know how the elbow got hurt, well not hurt hurt, but aching. It was when I was doing the forearm weight lifts yesterday. I dunno if I did them wrong or what, but afterwards, my elbow hurt to be straightened out.
My lower back, no clue. My upper back is probably just from playing WoW too much again. I just started back on it and my body isn' used to sitting in the computer chair for that long any longer lol.
Pretty pathetic way to injure yourself, but it happened.
No idea why my foot is bothering me though. I noticed it starting yesterday, but didn't think much of it, and now it hurts more.
So today, just going to take it easy. Go lay on the couch and rest my weak apparently frail body :P
Damn you milk! You lied!
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Done and done
I really wasn't going to exercise today. My laziness kicked in to high gear this morning before I got out of bed.
I was laying there trying to come up with some excuse I would use to continue not exercising. Not that the previous days were just made up excuses or anything lol.
But I grumpily got up and put on my workout stuff and did it at my usual time. I didn't want to. I wanted to sit on my computer playing World of Warcraft... but I knew I'd feel horrible if I allowed myself to be lazy.
I did sculpt today and it was pretty good. Didn't really do many lunges. My legs were jello almost instantly lol, but I still got in a pretty ok workout. Not great but ok.
My weight was back down to 221 today. WOO! hehe
I was laying there trying to come up with some excuse I would use to continue not exercising. Not that the previous days were just made up excuses or anything lol.
But I grumpily got up and put on my workout stuff and did it at my usual time. I didn't want to. I wanted to sit on my computer playing World of Warcraft... but I knew I'd feel horrible if I allowed myself to be lazy.
I did sculpt today and it was pretty good. Didn't really do many lunges. My legs were jello almost instantly lol, but I still got in a pretty ok workout. Not great but ok.
My weight was back down to 221 today. WOO! hehe
Friday, July 16, 2010
Offtopic about Inception
Since DH was off today, we went and saw Inception at noon when we knew it wouldn't be too busy.
Man... that movie is AWESOME.
It's just one of those movies you have to see for yourself. I know not everyone is going to like it, but it's hard not to.
The acting is spectacular, the FX are breathtakingly cool, and just the whole concept is damn nifty.
Even if you have some jackass spoil the ending. Don't be bummed b/c knowing the ending doesn't ruin the rest of the movie at all. It's only an interpretation of what the asshole THINKS the ending is. Seriously though.... knowing the ending does not ruin the rest of the movie. It's not like Sixth Sense or something where knowing the ending to that movie would actually ruin the whole thing.
Anywho, yep... that was my offtopic post :D
No exercise today, but I'm gonna bust it out tomorrow and Sunday, even if the provera is really kicking my ass this time.
Man... that movie is AWESOME.
It's just one of those movies you have to see for yourself. I know not everyone is going to like it, but it's hard not to.
The acting is spectacular, the FX are breathtakingly cool, and just the whole concept is damn nifty.
Even if you have some jackass spoil the ending. Don't be bummed b/c knowing the ending doesn't ruin the rest of the movie at all. It's only an interpretation of what the asshole THINKS the ending is. Seriously though.... knowing the ending does not ruin the rest of the movie. It's not like Sixth Sense or something where knowing the ending to that movie would actually ruin the whole thing.
Anywho, yep... that was my offtopic post :D
No exercise today, but I'm gonna bust it out tomorrow and Sunday, even if the provera is really kicking my ass this time.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
No exercise
Decided not to exercise.
This isn't like the other multiple days where I've just been lazy.
Well, I am being lazy but my body needs this day to rest. I can just feel it and it's right.
Oh I'm still going to feel guilty about resting, but so long as I pick things back up then it's all good.
DH has to work this weekend, so I can go ahead and exercise on Sunday since we're going to go grocery shopping later in the day.
This isn't like the other multiple days where I've just been lazy.
Well, I am being lazy but my body needs this day to rest. I can just feel it and it's right.
Oh I'm still going to feel guilty about resting, but so long as I pick things back up then it's all good.
DH has to work this weekend, so I can go ahead and exercise on Sunday since we're going to go grocery shopping later in the day.
Debating
I'm really debating with myself if I want to exercise today. Just feeling really BLAH and tired.
My throat feels really dry but not sore. And I dunno, just overall I feel beat.
If I do exercise (it's sculpt today), then I'm going to take it easy at first. See where my energy level is at.
Don't know if it's the provera or what but this sucks.
My throat feels really dry but not sore. And I dunno, just overall I feel beat.
If I do exercise (it's sculpt today), then I'm going to take it easy at first. See where my energy level is at.
Don't know if it's the provera or what but this sucks.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Sore Throat
Bleh... just noticed it a few mins ago. My throat is getting sore for some reason.
Hope it doesn't get worse. I'm trying not to swallow a lot to irritate it more.
Read that some women get sore throats before their periods... hrmm.. wonder if this is from the provera? *shrugs*
Hope I'm not getting sick.
Hope it doesn't get worse. I'm trying not to swallow a lot to irritate it more.
Read that some women get sore throats before their periods... hrmm.. wonder if this is from the provera? *shrugs*
Hope I'm not getting sick.
Stomach issues
Man, my stomach has been bad today.
I've been going in the morning.
I started exercising, and had to stop at the end b/c my stomach was rumbling and I had to go. BLEH I say!
Oh well, I didn't do abs and I didn't do about 2mins of the workout so not that big of a deal considering I once again, really didn't want to do it.
I'm so tired today. Not really sure why. I did wake up a little earlier, but only by about 30mins. And I didn't go to bed any later than I have been.
Maybe it's the provera? *shrugs*
May take a nap later, but doubt it. I'll stay up. Try to get to bed earlier today.
I've been going in the morning.
I started exercising, and had to stop at the end b/c my stomach was rumbling and I had to go. BLEH I say!
Oh well, I didn't do abs and I didn't do about 2mins of the workout so not that big of a deal considering I once again, really didn't want to do it.
I'm so tired today. Not really sure why. I did wake up a little earlier, but only by about 30mins. And I didn't go to bed any later than I have been.
Maybe it's the provera? *shrugs*
May take a nap later, but doubt it. I'll stay up. Try to get to bed earlier today.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
It's that time again!
End of week 4 and not much has changed. Should've worn the same sports bra to see what kind of difference there is for the photos, but meh, there really isn't any difference. SIGH. Disheartening but I'm a big girl and losing slowly isn't going to show up in photos ASAP. Gotta keep reminding myself these things.
Here are my stats.... First one will be from last week, 2nd will be this weeks
Weight- 221, 222
Left Upper Arm- 15.25, 15.5
Right Upper Arm- 16.25, 16
Bust- 42.75, 42.25
Below Bust- 39.25, 38.5
Belly above Bellybutton- 41.25, 41
Waist- 40, 39.5
Hips + Pooch- 47.5, 47
Right Mid Thigh- 22, 22
Left Mid Thigh- 22, 22
So yeah, some measurements have gone down, some haven't. Overall not too bad.
I think I should start measuring my thighs higher up. Where I've been measuring them now really isn't that fatty, but higher up it is and I think I'd see more measurement differences then.
I think I'll do that next week.
TTC news.... going to get provera today! WOO! Wanna get this cycle over and done with and start trying again hopefully!
A bit scared that I still have cysts though. Was getting some weird feeling in my right O last night. I pressed down and it ached. So *shrugs* FX that all is clear and we can start again.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Lazy Lazy Lazy
That Laziness is trying to sneak its way back in. Not sleeping well really helps it.
I really didn't want to exercise. Was thinking to myself that "Oh another rest day won't hurt." But I know if I let myself do that, it'll just continue until I've completely stopped and I can't let that happen.
So I got my butt up and did some cardio.
The only time I will allow myself to rest is during AF when it's heavy and gross. I don't wear tampons so wearing a pad, and sweating and moving around a lot when AF is heavy is not going to happen if I can help it.
I may just do the sculpt arm stuff, but that's it. No cardio.
TTC-wise.... afraid that I may still have large cysts. Been feeling twinges down there. I'm hoping it's just the smaller cysts rupturing or whatever, but who knows.
Going to have to call the RE today though. Noticed that I don't have another refill on my Metformin. Going to go ahead and ask if I can get the provera now as well.
I really didn't want to exercise. Was thinking to myself that "Oh another rest day won't hurt." But I know if I let myself do that, it'll just continue until I've completely stopped and I can't let that happen.
So I got my butt up and did some cardio.
The only time I will allow myself to rest is during AF when it's heavy and gross. I don't wear tampons so wearing a pad, and sweating and moving around a lot when AF is heavy is not going to happen if I can help it.
I may just do the sculpt arm stuff, but that's it. No cardio.
TTC-wise.... afraid that I may still have large cysts. Been feeling twinges down there. I'm hoping it's just the smaller cysts rupturing or whatever, but who knows.
Going to have to call the RE today though. Noticed that I don't have another refill on my Metformin. Going to go ahead and ask if I can get the provera now as well.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
So bad
We were SO bad last night after dinner!
We went to Bi-Lo after dinner to pick up some snacks. I got these truffle things and cupcakes.
Ate all of the truffle things and 1 cupcake. THEN we got our drank on.
Had some vodka, rum and kahlua. That kahlua stuff might as well just be syrup in a bottle. It was good with some milk though.
So yeah.... fun night but man.... just bad health-wise.
We went to Bi-Lo after dinner to pick up some snacks. I got these truffle things and cupcakes.
Ate all of the truffle things and 1 cupcake. THEN we got our drank on.
Had some vodka, rum and kahlua. That kahlua stuff might as well just be syrup in a bottle. It was good with some milk though.
So yeah.... fun night but man.... just bad health-wise.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
I'm melting... meeellltttting
It is a pain in the ass to exercise without a fan pointed at your sweaty butt.
I exercised in our uh exercise room. It has the treadmill and elliptical in it.
And there's no fan in that room and I was too lazy to go grab one lol.
Man, sweat dripping off of me.
I've been having Yoplait whips for lunch. Not every day, but a few days. Can't have those any longer! It contains high fructose corn syrup. Baaaad.... baaaaaaaaaaaaaad.
Damnit.... everything that tastes good has that shit in it.
I exercised in our uh exercise room. It has the treadmill and elliptical in it.
And there's no fan in that room and I was too lazy to go grab one lol.
Man, sweat dripping off of me.
I've been having Yoplait whips for lunch. Not every day, but a few days. Can't have those any longer! It contains high fructose corn syrup. Baaaad.... baaaaaaaaaaaaaad.
Damnit.... everything that tastes good has that shit in it.
Saturday.... uuuuuugh
It was overcast this morning, so lord help me, my energy level was crappity crapcrap.
I got up & laid on the couch and read the IR diet book a little bit.
It sounds like a good plan, but it's really confusing too. Kinda contridicts itself sometimes.
Like it'll say that it's ok to do one thing one minute, and then a few pages in, it'll say NOT to do it.
Oh well, I'm sure I'm just not reading it correctly or something rofl.
So, I woke up thinking I wasn't going to exercise. I convinced myself that I would just take 2 days off a week, and that was that. But NO LAZY SELF! I got up and got my workout clothes on. I'll have to go to another room to exercise since DH is playing PS3 on the main tv, but oh well.
I don't think I'm going to lose weight this week. I just feel it. Hopefully I'll still lose some inches, but who knows.
I think not exercising those 3 days really screwed me. And my eating hasn't been good either. But I'm starting that thing next week if I can just figure it out a bit better so.. we'll see how that goes.
I got up & laid on the couch and read the IR diet book a little bit.
It sounds like a good plan, but it's really confusing too. Kinda contridicts itself sometimes.
Like it'll say that it's ok to do one thing one minute, and then a few pages in, it'll say NOT to do it.
Oh well, I'm sure I'm just not reading it correctly or something rofl.
So, I woke up thinking I wasn't going to exercise. I convinced myself that I would just take 2 days off a week, and that was that. But NO LAZY SELF! I got up and got my workout clothes on. I'll have to go to another room to exercise since DH is playing PS3 on the main tv, but oh well.
I don't think I'm going to lose weight this week. I just feel it. Hopefully I'll still lose some inches, but who knows.
I think not exercising those 3 days really screwed me. And my eating hasn't been good either. But I'm starting that thing next week if I can just figure it out a bit better so.. we'll see how that goes.
Friday, July 9, 2010
Friday already
So, today has been, meh, ok so far.
Energy isn't great, but manageable. I did P90 cardio today. I think I'm keeping up with them better. Still not great but better.
I didn't do abs today though. Laid on the floor to do them, then just stayed there and stretched out. I did 10 regular ones, and a half assed side one but that was it rofl.
There's no good reason why I didn't do them other than I just didn't want to.
My thighs were really feeling it after the workout though.
Energy isn't great, but manageable. I did P90 cardio today. I think I'm keeping up with them better. Still not great but better.
I didn't do abs today though. Laid on the floor to do them, then just stayed there and stretched out. I did 10 regular ones, and a half assed side one but that was it rofl.
There's no good reason why I didn't do them other than I just didn't want to.
My thighs were really feeling it after the workout though.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Did it... yay
So I finally did exercise. I still had a headache though, but it was getting later and later and honetly, I was getting closer and closer to just saying screw it and not do anything.
But I didn't allow myself. When I felt like I was on that thin line of going either way, when I felt like I was tipping towards the lazy size, I said NOPE, and exercised.
So yay for that at least heh.
I did P90 sculpt today. I wanted to try floor pushups, even if I only did move a half an inch down, but my right wrist hurts from when I was doing the wall ones. It hurts whenever I put pressure on it. SO boo for that.
I wish I could do pushups..... they look like they workout so much and I feel like I'm missing out on a workout that could be really beneficial.
Oh and my insulin resistance book came in today. It sounds pretty interesting. Something that won't be too hard to stick with once you get the hang of it. It's not very restrictive at all. I mean of course it wants you eating heathier options, but that's not a MUST.
The basics of this diet is that you need to only have 2 servings of high carb foods during any one meal. And along with carbs, you need to balance that out with a protein. But you can have more protein of certain items if you're still feeling hungry and unsatisfied. Or more of certain veggies etc.
I'll def be trying this out starting next week. Gotta finish the book and then figure out my meals for next week.
But I didn't allow myself. When I felt like I was on that thin line of going either way, when I felt like I was tipping towards the lazy size, I said NOPE, and exercised.
So yay for that at least heh.
I did P90 sculpt today. I wanted to try floor pushups, even if I only did move a half an inch down, but my right wrist hurts from when I was doing the wall ones. It hurts whenever I put pressure on it. SO boo for that.
I wish I could do pushups..... they look like they workout so much and I feel like I'm missing out on a workout that could be really beneficial.
Oh and my insulin resistance book came in today. It sounds pretty interesting. Something that won't be too hard to stick with once you get the hang of it. It's not very restrictive at all. I mean of course it wants you eating heathier options, but that's not a MUST.
The basics of this diet is that you need to only have 2 servings of high carb foods during any one meal. And along with carbs, you need to balance that out with a protein. But you can have more protein of certain items if you're still feeling hungry and unsatisfied. Or more of certain veggies etc.
I'll def be trying this out starting next week. Gotta finish the book and then figure out my meals for next week.
Later
Exercise is going to have to wait til lter today. Felt a headache coming on and took some tylenol ASAP. But it hasn't kicked in yet I guess.
I know straining while exercising will make it worse, so going to postpone exercising until a little later.
Eating lunch right now. Maybe eating will help speed things up somehow.
I know straining while exercising will make it worse, so going to postpone exercising until a little later.
Eating lunch right now. Maybe eating will help speed things up somehow.
Back down, whew!
Weighed again this morning (I know I know), and my weight was back down to 221. So whew. It was just barely 221, but still better than seeing 224 again.
My eating needs to be improved a lot. Been having icecream every night this week, and that's just not going to fly. Well, thankfully now my fav mint chocolate chip is all gone so I won't be so tempted to have more.
Hmmm, feels like there was something else I wanted to mention...... Oh well, if it was important I'll think of it later.
My eating needs to be improved a lot. Been having icecream every night this week, and that's just not going to fly. Well, thankfully now my fav mint chocolate chip is all gone so I won't be so tempted to have more.
Hmmm, feels like there was something else I wanted to mention...... Oh well, if it was important I'll think of it later.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Sooo tired
So I did the 45min cardio. Didn't do the abs though. Near the end of my workout, not sure why but felt like I was going to puke. You know that feeling of when you drink a lot and you can actually hear and feel all of it swishing around in your stomach?
It was kind of like that, except that I couldn't hear anything and that particular feeling has never made me nauseous before.
And with the 45min workout, I can't keep up with them completely yet.
The last bit isn't that bad w/ the kicks and punches, but the first part, w/ the knee lifts and then jumping jacks and what is called X-work. Just kills my calf muscles. Hopefully sticking with it though I'll actually be able to do it all one day.
Anywho, after working out and taking my shower... man, I just wanted to lay down and die on the couch.
I am SO tired. I took a nap, slept for 2 hours in a light nap most of the time which is usually more than enough. BUt I had to force myself up and I'm still feeling lik I could go and sleep for another 4 hours.
I haven't had a problem sleeping at night for a little while now so not sure what the problem is other than the usual hormonal thing screwing with me.
It was kind of like that, except that I couldn't hear anything and that particular feeling has never made me nauseous before.
And with the 45min workout, I can't keep up with them completely yet.
The last bit isn't that bad w/ the kicks and punches, but the first part, w/ the knee lifts and then jumping jacks and what is called X-work. Just kills my calf muscles. Hopefully sticking with it though I'll actually be able to do it all one day.
Anywho, after working out and taking my shower... man, I just wanted to lay down and die on the couch.
I am SO tired. I took a nap, slept for 2 hours in a light nap most of the time which is usually more than enough. BUt I had to force myself up and I'm still feeling lik I could go and sleep for another 4 hours.
I haven't had a problem sleeping at night for a little while now so not sure what the problem is other than the usual hormonal thing screwing with me.
STAY DOWN DAMNIT!
I know I shouldn't weigh myself very day, but sigh.. I can't help it.
So I weighed myself this morning and it was back up to 224!!! I then went out, watered the garden. Came back in about 20-30mins later... undressed to get in to my workout stuff... weighed myself again while still nekkid.. and it was up to 225!!! Really???
Just BLEH... I know it's probably nothing and it'll go back down, but still.. DAMNIT. I hate it when it fluctuates. Just stay down!
Sigh.. just so frustrating and disheartening.
Going to try to remember that fluctuating weight will happen. I mean obviously I didn't gain back 4lbs in a day.
All I have to do is feel how loose my rings are becoming b/c I am losing weight.
Oh I'm trying out a new sports bra today. Feel like Boobs Mcgee here. DH wanted me to get it b/c it has a zipper in front.. sigh, perv..... it's a really snug sports bra which I like, but it shows a lot of boobage. That's not a problem though since no one else is here.
So I weighed myself this morning and it was back up to 224!!! I then went out, watered the garden. Came back in about 20-30mins later... undressed to get in to my workout stuff... weighed myself again while still nekkid.. and it was up to 225!!! Really???
Just BLEH... I know it's probably nothing and it'll go back down, but still.. DAMNIT. I hate it when it fluctuates. Just stay down!
Sigh.. just so frustrating and disheartening.
Going to try to remember that fluctuating weight will happen. I mean obviously I didn't gain back 4lbs in a day.
All I have to do is feel how loose my rings are becoming b/c I am losing weight.
Oh I'm trying out a new sports bra today. Feel like Boobs Mcgee here. DH wanted me to get it b/c it has a zipper in front.. sigh, perv..... it's a really snug sports bra which I like, but it shows a lot of boobage. That's not a problem though since no one else is here.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
End of week uh.. 3?
SO the end of week 3. Wasn't very good this week with the exercising at all.
Lets see, what are my excuses.
On saturday, we went grocery shopping & went to a movie, so I didn't want to do anything then.
Sunday, I woke up early to start cooking some desserts for a July 4th family get together thing at noon. That whole thing took up my day until around 6pm.
And then Monday was spent going out to Walmart & Home Depot and working in the garden for a little bit.
SO yeah, my excuses for not doing anything. I felt guilty about it, but honestly, I didn't want to.
Anywho, here are my weekly photos. I look fatter in my side shot. Still no visible changes. I have a lot of inches to lose before you can actually notice a difference I think heh. And I'm hoping doing that Insulin Resistance Diet will help get rid of the belly fat. Just hope that book comes in soon so I can start doing it next week.
End of Week 3 stats
It'll be from week 2, then 3
Weight- 223, 221
Left Upper Arm- 15.5, 15.25
Right Upper Arm- 16.5, 16.25
Bust- 43.2, 42.75
Below Bust- 39.5, 39.25
Belly (above bellybutton)- 42, 41.25
Waist- 40.75, 40
Hips & Pooch- 48, 47.5
Right Mid Thigh- 23.5, 22
Left Mid Thigh- 22.25, 22
So after the last week of my numbers actually going up, this week, they've gone down. Not much, but hopefully it continues to just keep dropping. As I mentioned, I'm really hoping that that diet helps to get rid of the belly fat quicker.
Going to be doing the harder cardio workout this week, but I think I'll stick with the regular weight training stuff for now. Just don't think my muscles are ready to do more just yet.
Weight training today!
Monday, July 5, 2010
Welp..
No exercise today either.
Oh well. Went to bed late cooking a damn cheesecake (that turned out great), and woke up too early to fix the regular cake. Took freaking forever to prepare all of that crap. Exhausting.
DH hurt his leg exercising (his calf muscle). I told him I'm not going to let him stop completely. No leg exercises until he's healed, but he can still keep up the upper body stuff. This happened to him before, same exact leg, same injury, and he gained all the weight back he had lost b/c he stopped exercising.
I won't let him do that again.
Oh well. Went to bed late cooking a damn cheesecake (that turned out great), and woke up too early to fix the regular cake. Took freaking forever to prepare all of that crap. Exhausting.
DH hurt his leg exercising (his calf muscle). I told him I'm not going to let him stop completely. No leg exercises until he's healed, but he can still keep up the upper body stuff. This happened to him before, same exact leg, same injury, and he gained all the weight back he had lost b/c he stopped exercising.
I won't let him do that again.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Nothing today
Today is going to be my rest day.
Since tomorrow is the 4th of July, we're doing a family thing and need to go grocery shopping today.. Also I want to see a movie, so the day is kind of filled.
I swear.... am I ever going to stick with Sunday being my rest day? lol
Since tomorrow is the 4th of July, we're doing a family thing and need to go grocery shopping today.. Also I want to see a movie, so the day is kind of filled.
I swear.... am I ever going to stick with Sunday being my rest day? lol
Friday, July 2, 2010
Wow...
That workout really kicked my butt.
Before, doing the other one, I would sweat, but this one had me pouring sweat.
I couldn't keep up with it all. Specially the first part w/ the knee lifts, but I tried. I had to stop multiple times to catch my breath and to rest my aching legs, but I kept up better than I thought I would.
I really need to work on my flexibility though. God I hate that strain... HATE IT. But so many of the warmups requires you to be somewhat flexible and I'm just not. I'm slowly trying to improve it, hopefully that little bit I am trying helps.
Before, doing the other one, I would sweat, but this one had me pouring sweat.
I couldn't keep up with it all. Specially the first part w/ the knee lifts, but I tried. I had to stop multiple times to catch my breath and to rest my aching legs, but I kept up better than I thought I would.
I really need to work on my flexibility though. God I hate that strain... HATE IT. But so many of the warmups requires you to be somewhat flexible and I'm just not. I'm slowly trying to improve it, hopefully that little bit I am trying helps.
Harder today
Going to do the harder sweat routine today. It's the same exact stuff except they go a bit faster and it's a longer workout.
I don't think I'm getting the workouts that I should, so hopefully this helps. I don't think I'll be able to move to the longer sculpt just yet, but I think I'll be ok w/ the sweat.
I don't think I'm going to have very good results this coming tuesday or wednesday. I know my thighs are getting more toned, and I can actually feel my bicep muscles now, but I don't think I'll be losing any inches or weight.
Saw on the soulcysters website, someone mentioned something called the Insulin Resistance Diet. Going to look in to getting that book. See if it's something I want to try out. I think that's def what I need right now. A better way of eating to help with my insulin resistance. Hopefully I'll have the book tonight. Swing by the book store on the way home from dinner.
I wish I knew what my body was trying to do. I've been getting EWCM every time I have a BM which isn't normal for me. Also, before, I'd usually just break out around my chin and jawline, but now, pimples are popping up all over the place on my face. It hasn't gotten THAT bad yet thankfully though.
Also my BBT have been all over the place. It'll be down one day, then up high like it has been the next. My chart looks like a rollarcoaster.
I don't think I'm getting the workouts that I should, so hopefully this helps. I don't think I'll be able to move to the longer sculpt just yet, but I think I'll be ok w/ the sweat.
I don't think I'm going to have very good results this coming tuesday or wednesday. I know my thighs are getting more toned, and I can actually feel my bicep muscles now, but I don't think I'll be losing any inches or weight.
Saw on the soulcysters website, someone mentioned something called the Insulin Resistance Diet. Going to look in to getting that book. See if it's something I want to try out. I think that's def what I need right now. A better way of eating to help with my insulin resistance. Hopefully I'll have the book tonight. Swing by the book store on the way home from dinner.
I wish I knew what my body was trying to do. I've been getting EWCM every time I have a BM which isn't normal for me. Also, before, I'd usually just break out around my chin and jawline, but now, pimples are popping up all over the place on my face. It hasn't gotten THAT bad yet thankfully though.
Also my BBT have been all over the place. It'll be down one day, then up high like it has been the next. My chart looks like a rollarcoaster.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Right Arm
My right arm is jus feeling strange all over the place.
Thought it was just my shoulder but my elbow area started to really hurt when I was working out. AND I hurt my wrist doing freaking wall pushups of all things.
So I couldn't even attempt to do pushups, wall, floor everything. I did push throuh some of the workouts that were making my elbow hurt, and thankfully my shoulder wasn't a problem surprisingly.
I must be sleeping on it all wrong or something. Who knows.
Anyways, I did the sculpt today. Really tried doing the lunges better. Didn't even attempt another workout. I just don't think I'm physically there yet to include more. I'm going to try harder next week though. Try to include more and stick with it. Not give up.
Thought it was just my shoulder but my elbow area started to really hurt when I was working out. AND I hurt my wrist doing freaking wall pushups of all things.
So I couldn't even attempt to do pushups, wall, floor everything. I did push throuh some of the workouts that were making my elbow hurt, and thankfully my shoulder wasn't a problem surprisingly.
I must be sleeping on it all wrong or something. Who knows.
Anyways, I did the sculpt today. Really tried doing the lunges better. Didn't even attempt another workout. I just don't think I'm physically there yet to include more. I'm going to try harder next week though. Try to include more and stick with it. Not give up.
Something going on
So last night, man my sleep was AWFUL. I couldn't get to sleep, then I couldn't stay asleep. Very annoying considering I was barely able to keep my eyes open sitting at the computer.
Surprisingly, I'm not that tired. I feel a little low energy, but not like on Tuesday.
I was having some ovary cramping last night though. It didn't last long, but they weren't pleasant. I'd say on a scale of 1-10, 1 being nothing, and 1 feeling like your ovary is going to explode... the pain was at a 5. It occured about 3 times on my left O, and once on my right.
Maybe it's the cysts. Who the hell knows.
Surprisingly, I'm not that tired. I feel a little low energy, but not like on Tuesday.
I was having some ovary cramping last night though. It didn't last long, but they weren't pleasant. I'd say on a scale of 1-10, 1 being nothing, and 1 feeling like your ovary is going to explode... the pain was at a 5. It occured about 3 times on my left O, and once on my right.
Maybe it's the cysts. Who the hell knows.
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