Saturday, February 5, 2011

Feeling..... calm but nervous

First, I just wanted to post a photo of the FRER dried. The line obviously dried darker and just wanted to post it :P lol You can tell it has color there, but just wish I could've seen that color earlier.

Honestly, I'm actually feeling calm right now. Very weird.
I'm still nervous that this isn't real or that it's going to end like my last BFP. But I dunno... I feel calm.
I do wish the spotting would stop though. I stopped taking the baby aspirin just in case that was making it worse.
I'm still waiting to celebrate. I know others would be jumping off the walls with excitement if they were in my shoes, but I just can't right now. With what has happened w/ the early loss, and this spotting/bleeding, I just don't want to celebrate too soon when things could go wrong.
I'll start getting more excited if the tests start to get darker. If everything is still going ok, going to make an appointment for the beta for Tuesday afternoon. Now THAT is going to make me nervous. If my tests start getting darker, I'll get more confidence that everything will be ok, but until then... BLEH.

I don't think I'm really having any symptoms. Well I may have some, but it could be from the progesterone.

I think the only thing that could be a symptom are the constant dull headaches. I only had to take tylenol for it once, but even then I probably didn't need to. I just thought it was going to get worse.

Bewbs really aren't all that sore. There's a deep tissue kind of sore, but that's about it. Been wearing bras for the past 2 days so maybe that's helping.

I haven't pooped yet today :P Awesome huh heh. Seriously though. Salads or any green veg makes me have to go. Ate a salad yesterday and nothing.

And yeah, that's it so far. Is it sad that I wish I had more symptoms? hehe Where's the nausea? Where's the extremely painful boobs? How about the super sensitive smelling powers? Come on body! I will gladly suffer through any and all of those.

So yep, that's where I'm at right now. Feeling weirdly at peace, but have that nervous feeling as well.
FX for a darker test tomorrow and FX that this awful spotting/bleeding will stop.

Oh and speaking of that really quick.
I put in my 2nd sup this afternoon, the applicator I use had 2 tiny clots on the end of it. It didn't look like fresh clots though. the blood around it just didn't have that bright fresh look if that makes sense.
Still... that doesn't make me more confident to see.
Little bit of blood on pad, but I think it was only there b/c it travelled out w/ the waxy gunk.
And yep, a little bit of the peachy stuff on the TP when I use the bathroom.
UGH I want it to stop!


Annabelle said...

OMG!!!!! I am really hoping this is your BFP!! How long ago was your HCG shots?

LisaL said...

My HCG shot was 15 days ago. I tested the trigger out and I think it was gone by 8 days past the shot. 8 or 9 days.